FEARLESS FRIDAYS · TIPS

5 things I wish I had known when I was younger

1.CHALLENGING MYSELF TO DO SOMETHING POTENTIALLY USEFUL/MEANINGFUL/BEAUTIFUL IS INTRINSICALLY VALUABLE EVEN IF I FAIL AT IT. Anything from starting a business to entering a dance competition. People may laugh at you or think you’re a failure but its all about the big picture. You stepped out of your comfort zone(I hate that expression but its apt) and dared to contribute something of yourself. In case they didn’t tell you, I will.  Congratulations you are officially awesome. Fear is what usually stops you. You have to banish fear. This is a quotation from the book “A Single Man” by Christopher Isherwood

”Fear, after all, is our real enemy. Fear is taking over our world. Fear is being used as a tool of manipulation in our society. It’s how politicians peddle policy and how Madison Avenue sells us things that we don’t need. Think about it. Fear that we’re going to be attacked, fear that there are communists lurking around every corner, fear that some little Caribbean country that doesn’t believe in our way of life poses a threat to us. Fear that black culture may take over the world. Fear of Elvis Presley’s hips. Well, maybe that one is a real fear. Fear that our bad breath might ruin our friendships… Fear of growing old and being alone.” 

2. I MUST NOT SETTLE FOR LESS IN RELATIONSHIPS.It’s usually people who feel they don’t want to come off too selfish or picky that struggle with this. We are all flawed beings. Fact. So find someone with qualities you admire and flaws you can handle or are comfortable with. No good will come of being with someone who you can’t love just as they are. If you have to picture who they could potentially be to love them, there’s a problem. It doesn’t make sense to be spouting till death do us part with someone who you feel embarrassed by. This was expressed by Don Miguel Ruiz in his book ‘The Mastery of Love’ which I read a year or two ago

‘You are going to be the right man for her if she loves you just the way you are and she doesn’t want to change you. She doesn’t have to be responsible for you; she can trust that you are going to be what you claim you are, what you project you are. She can be as honest as possible and project to you what she is. She will not come to you pretending to be something that you later discover she is not. The one who loves you,loves you just the way you are. Because if someone wants to change you, it means you are not what that person wants. Then why is she with you?’

 

3.I HAVE TO BELIEVE IN MYSELF BEFORE ANYONE CAN BELIEVE IN ME. Exceptions exist but they are rare. You have to look out for yourself and convince yourself of your own worth. If you keep telling someone that you don’t deserve their love/time/affection, they’ll start believing it one day. That ‘I am worthless and nobody will ever love me’ shit has gotten old. Stop it! This attitude makes it difficult for people to have relationships with you. Everyone of us has fragile moments when we need a bit of extra tenderness and assurance but you can’t be like that all the time. If you have a goal or dream, develop some self belief and start pursuing it. Nobody will telepathically determine that deep-seated aspiration of yours and fight your through the gates of your self-doubt to support you and rally for your success. You have to do it for yourself!

4. FAMILY AND FRIENDS TRULY DESERVE LOVE AND LOYALTY. I’m not referring to the people you tolerate at family weddings or the ones that you can’t call when terrible things happen in your life. I mean the ones who really love you. It’s so easy to take those people for granted because they’re always there. Often when someone who we love makes a mistake or does something wrong we blow it out of proportion and get caught up in their imperfections . We forget that they are the people we should love and support just because. Sometimes we get caught up with impressing people who don’t care about us and neglect those that are always there.

When we’re dealing with the people in our family – no matter how annoying or gross they may be, no matter how self-inflicted their suffering may appear, no matter how afflicted they are with ignorance, prejudice or nose hairs – we give from the deepest parts of ourselves’. – Anne Lammott

5.THERE WILL ALWAYS BE A LEVEL OF EMPTINESS IF I DON’T HAVE A RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD.No matter what one has or achieves, how many friends and fans they’ve amassed it won’t truly sustain, the way God will . Matthew 6: 33 says But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness, and all these things shall be added unto you.’

These are some of my life lessons, please let me know what yours are. Have a superb weekend!

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s