It’s been a freaking while hasn’t it? Im back into your virtual webbed embrace. Unfortunately I had a super legit excuse for absconding
My mother passed away in March exactly 3 months ago to this day, on a Saturday evening completely unexpectedly. I had never lost anyone close to me or been to a funeral ceremony of any kind, ever, before this event occurred. Suddenly, I was burying the person I loved the most in the world.
In that blurry chapter of numb fortitude, mortuary visits, generic condolences, draining conversations, tactless insensitive questions and watching my life get reshuffled, I AGED A LITTLE AND LEARNED A LOT.
I have gone through three months of the perpetual nightmare of re-realising that she hasn’t just popped in for a window shop at Apostrophe or for the lamb shank at Rotisserie. This is real. This is not a trip from which she will ever return.
Nkiruka- my mother, my best friend. Superstar. Bebe, you were one of a kind.I MISS YOUR SPARKING WIT AND YOUR ROARING LAUGHTER. I miss your stories and being able to get your advice…even when I thought i didn’t want it because lets face it , you were kind of always right. You were always full of faith, passion, warmth and wisdom. You were a classy, beautiful, intelligent woman. You were the best mother, God could give a child. I hate that you’re a memory because I still think of you in present tense. I will always remember you as a precious gift I was privileged to have. With every future milestone that spurs me onto greatness and becoming the woman you raised me to be I will remember, miss and celebrate you. One day soon, when I have my own babies I will teach them the things you taught me and tell them about you all the time. Sometimes the pain of your loss is just too hard to bear but there’s just too much ahead of me so I can’t afford the luxury of falling apart. I must go forth and shine, and I will simply because that’s the woman you raised me to be.
je t’aime mamman!