FATHERS’ DAY is tomorrow. The day we get to celebrate the incredible men out there who raise their children with love and sacrifice. Shout out to all the great dads throughout the world. These are the men that give guidance, security, strength and commitment to their families everyday. They lead by example and pour out time, resources and emotional support without abandon to their families, constantly. They teach their sons how to be a good man and their daughters how to be loved by a man. They (like the single mothers who do the same) are super heroes. Embarrassing dad-dancing aside, they truly deserve our love and appreciation.
There is no such thing as the perfect dad though a combination of Dr Huxtable ‘The Cosby Show’, Sandy Cohen ‘The OC’, Phil Dunphy ‘Modern Family’ and Philip Banks ‘Fresh Prince of Bel Air’ comes pretty damn close. By the way isn’t The West Wing’s President Bartlett just #dadgoals? The irony is not lost on me that they are all constructs of fiction, like many great dads. Admittedly, for some people Father’s Day is not all shits and giggles. It is a farce which is as relevant to them as Kwanzaa is to an Eskimo. It reminds them that they have lost a father to either death or disinterest. My thoughts go out to anyone whose beloved father has passed on. For those with fathers (yes there are mothers like this too!) who treat fatherhood like a gym membership – something optional and sometimes not worth the trouble ,you are the superhero. You are not defined by another persons inability to love or fulfil their responsibility to you.
Honey, Thats their baggage not yours.
Should we assemble with out pitchforks and taunt the men who father children and chose not to raise them? As deliciously satisfying as that prospect seems , there are a few things to bear in mind. Fathers, are like any other person. Like you and I they can be broken, irresponsible, lazy or apathetic about important things like their children and still be committed to and amazing at other things. Truthfully, Some men never grow up or out of their dysfunctional meanderings. Some make terrible mistakes in their relationships with their offspring which they remain too proud to attempt to correct. They are still people who can always redeem themselves from any wrongdoing…or people who just never will. I recently read a killer article – ‘When our Fathers Left’ by Mikki Halpin, editor at large of one of my favourite haunts lennyletter.com. She had one of those complicated fathers.
Even if my father and mother abandon me, the LORD will hold me close. Psalm 27:10 (NLT)
More than anything, We can all contribute something to fatherhood in our societies. Whether or not you are a man or have given birth to a man. I urge us all to raise men who understand the importance of fatherhood by encouraging and supporting the ones who already respect the responsibility they have, and teaching the young men who hope to be fathers one day the value of that role. Lets all try to reduce the amount of therapy sessions our kids need.
To all the loving fathers out there HAPPY FATHERS DAY!